adventures of the friday shirt
so after a full day of reading some hilarious jokes about my rad friday shirt, I set out to have a good time and enjoy the weekend. I went to meet some friends over at a swanky rooftop bar called 230 Fifth. I roll up to the spot and the bouncer takes a glance at my super gnarly outfit, and says "sorry sir, I can't let you in with that shirt". turns out the place has a set of dress code rules posted on a sign in front of this cheeseball establishment, and I pretty much violated every rule on the list.
so I wept in sorrow from nyc front door rejection status and then ventured over to a friends birthday party. at the end of the night, I walk home and on the way grab a slice of pizza. and as I'm taking out my keys to enter my apt building, a cutie little hipster girl is walking past me and says "man I really want a slice of pizza....and I reallllly wanted that Uniqlo t-shirt." I turn around and say "oh really now??". she replies with "oh yes...I wish I could have found it in a big enough size to wear like a one piece dress" and I go..."very nicceee...what will you give me for it?" and she goes "I'll give you a kiss..." now I really had to think hard about this decision...especially being that I was completely drunk. and I just couldn't do it. I couldn't give away a shirt that had brought me so much adventure...pain and joy...sorrow and bliss. so I said to the girl of my dreams..."I like you...I like you a lot...but I just can't do this...I can't". I know you are all probably pulling your hair out, and thinking "what a dumbass"! but I feel like this only proves my game is so damn tight that I don't need to buy a girl drinks at some fru fru rooftop bar. all I need is a dash of debonair, a hint of charm, a slice of pizza, and the shirt off my back. wasup now all your haters??!!! =)
so the big question is: is that game...or is that super game?
11 comments:
Is this is a rhetorical question?
Were you alone at the time? If not, your friends were obligated to champion this shirt-for-kiss transaction. The thought of you being all giddy afterwards, shitcanned, eating pizza, big, Asian and shirtless – that would have made a great Match.com profile pic.
First off, I agree with Jade b/c that's EXACTLY what I told you on Friday when you texted me telling me about this "adventure." Not an adventure and NOT game and certainly NOT super game.
Let me define "super game" for you. It's me going out to buy flowers for one boy to cheer him up and returning w/ a different boy and no flowers. Then going home and whaleboning guy I picked up on the way to buy flowers for other boy.
Super game is NOT having some drunk random with Asian fetish want to make out with you for your thrift store pajama shirt.
did you really turn to the "girl of your dreams" and say that? that's negative game. you had better hope fate has some amazing plans for you and your ice-cream-cone shirt, or this will just be a really pathetic story you tell to the clerk at the salvation army when you drop the shirt off on your 36th birthday.
DLo- are you 13 years old? Seriously. That story has junior high written all over it. Enough.
Sometimes I think you're done embarrassing yourself...and then you write something like this.
wow.
which sissy bed-wetter deleted their comment? get in on the DLo hate hate hate or don't get in at all!!! Just look at the picture of him below with the ice cream cup and the ice cream cone shirt! hate it!
Was this cute little hipster girl named Scott Hazelton?
theoretical adventures of what might have been are not adventures and fantasy is not game...if you had game this scenario would have been parlayed into no less than a make out session and shared slice in which case you emerge with your shirt and a phone number, or maybe that is super game...whatever...get your swag up homey
Sometimes the best game comes in the form of nonchalance.
Is "Petey Pablo" actually DLo?
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